So I'm trying to catch the climax of NCIS on TV this evening, when Lagniappe up and decides that it's time for him to eat. I don't know what he bases this decision on since he doesn't have a watch, but every night at about this time, he starts capering around, and when I ignore him, as I did tonight, he starts barking at me.
I tell him to wait until commercial but he keeps barking. Apparently he thinks that he will starve to death before the next commercial break. But I raise my voice and let him know that he'll get fed in a few minutes, and he backs off.
So I make him wait until the show is over. Silly dog can't tell the difference between the show and the commercials anyway. Then I go into the kitchen and pick up his dish. This spurs him to break into yet another rendition of his "feed me" dance. He prances, he hops, he bounces... I swear that you'd think that this dog just got off the last bus from Ethiopia or something the way that he acts.
So I go into the pantry area where the food bag is and put the food in his dish, and when I turn around, he sits right in front of me so I can't even get back into the kitchen where he's supposed to eat. His eyes are focused like lasers on his dish.
"Oh, ok? You really want some food that bad? Here ya go." I take one nugget of his Eukanuba dog food and hand it to him. He takes it and chews it up. Wow--he actually chewed it. This is a dog that normally wolfs a whole bowl down in about ten seconds. I hand him another piece. Then another. And he chews each one. So I'm giving him his dinner one nugget at a time, and this is kinda fun. It's like feeding a huge squirrel. I figure this could take about half an hour or so, but he suddenly gets impatient and lunges at me, hitting the bottom of the bowl with his nose and flipping it right out of my hands. Dog food goes everywhere.
So now we're in the kitchen, and there's dog food all over the floor. I'm thinking that he's going to eat it but he just sits back down and looks at me, then at the bowl upside down on the floor, and then back at me, as if to ask "So, you gonna fill that back up, or what?"
Damn dog!
ReplyDeleteWhat a dick. And that floor is seriously ugly.
ReplyDeleteHey, man! That 1970's floor matches my chairs and most of my shirts perfectly.
ReplyDeletelol....Too funny!! That dog so has you trained! ;)
ReplyDeleteThanks I needed a laugh.
ReplyDeleteShit. I was gonna say we have exactly the same linoleum but I think I'll pass now....
ReplyDelete