Recently the Pope took a few days off to visit the mountains of Alaska for some sight-seeing. He was cruising along the campground in the Pope-mobile when there was a frantic commotion just at the edge of the woods.
A helpless hippie, reeking of marijuana and wearing sandals, shorts, a "Code Pink" hat and an "Occupy Wall Street" T-shirt with an "Obama 2012" pin on it, was screaming and thrashing around as he tried to free himself from the grasp of a 10 foot grizzly bear.
As the Pope watched horrified, a group of loggers came racing up. One quickly fired a .44 magnum into the bear's chest. The other two reached up and pulled the bleeding, semiconscious hippie from the bear's grasp, then using long clubs, the three loggers finished off the bear and two of them threw it onto the bed of their truck, while the third tenderly placed the injured hippie in the back seat.
As they prepared to leave, the Pope summoned them to come over.
'I give you my blessing for your brave actions!' he told them.
'I heard there was a bitter hatred between Conservative American working men and Liberal Democrat hippies, but now I've seen with my own eyes that this is not true.'
As the Pope drove off, one of the loggers asked his buddies, 'Who was that guy?'
'It was the Pope,' another replied. 'He's in direct contact with heaven and has access to all wisdom.'
'Well,' the logger said, 'he may have access to all wisdom, but he sure don't know nothin' about bear huntin! Is the bait holding up, or do we need to go back to Seattle and get another one?'
You win today's intarwebz!
ReplyDeletegroan.... chuckle... snort
ReplyDeleteOld Alaska joke involving a greenhorn, whiskey, a First Nations woman (Must be PC Now) and a bear.
ReplyDeleteWhile installing factory built condos in Kodiak, a float plane brought in a man mauled by a bear. Big event in that sleepy town. Ambulance, EMTs, police and even the doctors and nurses were on the dock. We were part of the gawkers.
As the man was being transferred to the ambulance, one of the doctors asked how he felt.
"Don't want to wrestle as squaw right now", was the reply.