Gentrify already!

Currently I'm working in an area that's fast turning over, with productive people moving in, renovating run-down properties, and replacing the low-achievement crowd that's been living there for so long. In addition to eradicating blight and dropping the crime stats, this neighborhood revitalization has caused several new upscale stores and markets to move in to cater to the desires of the newer residents who tend to have enough folding money to shop there.

One of these markets has a fantastic deli section that makes sandwiches to die for, so being all uncharacteristically nice and stuff today, I went in there to buy lunch for the folks working under me. And I was reminded that the revitalization still has a way to go.

First, an obese woman in line ahead of me wearing sweats who could not be bothered to get off of her Obamaphone cell phone when it was her turn to order. Instead, she kept her conversation going and talked to the waiting counter girl when it was convenient for her. She also had to micro-manage the construction of her sandwich, down to saying stuff like: "More red pepper than that...more...still more...oh, that's too much. You got to brush some of that back off."

It took that woman almost six minutes to get two sandwiches made, sandwiches that should have been smacked together in under two. (Or better yet--phoned in.) The line behind her of people who were obviously on lunch breaks appeared to bother her not one bit.

And then it was my turn, and--mea culpa--I was ordering five sandwiches and hadn't called it in. But at least they were all the same and I had it all written down and they were all done in under five minutes. However this was obviously not fast enough for the big woman behind me--the one wearing pajama bottoms and a sleeveless top that looked like it had started life as a wrapper for something greasy. Like cellphone lady ahead of us, she was clearly one of the neighborhood's "old guard". About half way through my order prep, she started in with the loud sighing and the "Come ON, already! I'm HON-gry!"

I was so tempted to just turn around and ask her why she was in such a hurry, as I doubted that she had a job or anything to get back to, but at the last second, I realized that my shirt bore the logo of my workplace and the inevitable complaint would not be received well. (Ask me how I know about that sometime.)

I finally got the sandwiches and left, and I'm grateful for this deli and the other nice new places popping up in this neighborhood after decades of decay and blight, but I can't help wish that the realtors and developers would push a little harder and get this place gentrified already. It can't come too son.

Oh, and WHY didn't I buy property here ten years ago or so? Sigh.