Saturday, January 09, 2016

Nine Hundred Million...

So when I win tonight's Powerball and go get my check for nearly a billion dollars, I'll be shopping.

First purchase: a caribbean island, complete with an airstrip and a harbor and wharf that can accommodate warships.

Next purchase: warplanes and a warship.

Next: Army of beautiful Amazon ninja warriorettes.

Add a few sharks with "frikin' lazers attached to their heads" and I'll be all set to commence with my latest plan to take. Over. The. World.

It took the Germans a month and a half to take France in 1940. I'm thinking that me and my invincible army of Amazon ninjas can beat that.

Using France as a base, we'll take Germany and the Low Countries and roll up much of the former Eastern Bloc by October or so, leaving us ready for our march on Moscow. In the winter. Just to prove that it can be done.

Hmmm...might need to round out my army with some Norwegian Viking-stock warriorettes too, just for winter operations.

Yeah, when I get that check tomorrow, I'll be on my way to the top of the world. Muhuhahahaha!


Yeah, lottery. Where else can you buy such cool dreams for just two dollars?

9 comments:

  1. I volunteer to be Head of Communications!!!

    For a suitable fee, of course.....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're hired. Bring the Iowa.

      Delete
  2. Why in earth would anyone want France?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Location, location, location. And any other nation in Europe might actually put up a fight. Besides, when I take France, I take their nukes. Then it gets real.

      Delete
  3. LOL, dreaming big never hurt...

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  4. Your plot for world domination reads suspiciously like the plot to the James Coburn movie In Like Flint, which would make a good Saturday Man Movie, now that I think of it. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It would, Derek Flint was the man indeed. Tough to find action clips from these movies now though. Youtube is on a tear about them for copyright reasons.

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    2. The copyright holders should release a few clips of the movies. Might encourage sales of the DVDs.

      Delete
  5. I've not bought a ticket in years, but I bought TWO yesterday!
    Well, they say no one one, and it could go up to $1.3B !!
    We could by an island or a small country for that(?)

    gfa

    ReplyDelete