Monday, December 26, 2016

I started the holiday off with a bang this year.

And not the kind people like.

As I was at the airport to pic the family up, at a dead stop in the line for "Arrivals", suddenly my SUV took a heck of a jolt and I got rear-ended fairly hard. WTF?!?

I got out and this fattish woman behind me in some stoopid wanna-be "cross-over" SUV lite was sitting there looking all shocked that she'd just plowed into me.

My first question to her, with concern in my voice: "Are you ok?"

My second question, after she answered that she was: "What the hell is wrong with you?!" I'd been at a dead stop for ten to fifteen seconds--it's not like I'd just braked or anything.

"UH, I was looking down at something, she replied." And sure enough, she still had some little booklet in her hand.

If it had been her phone, I'da been tempted to snatch it and pitch it over the nearby fence onto the tarmac.

But then I looked at the rear of my vehicle, expecting to see some significant damage because she'd hit me hard. Surprisingly, mine had not a scuff. The I saw why. She'd driven into and onto my trailer hitch and torn up her front bumper and grill something impressive. Her vehicle never even made contact with any part of mine other than the ball hitch.

"Have a nice day and pay attention to what you're doing," I said. Then I got back into my vehicle and drove off. And people wonder why I have this thing about women drivers...sheesh!

Ironically, I'd spent like twenty minutes trying to get that trailer hitch OFF just a few weeks ago but couldn't get one rusted cotter pin to move so I gave up on it. I'm glad now that I wasn't able to get it off, because she'd have torn the hell out of my rear bumper and tailgate but for that hitch.


  1. You are welcome.

    Weeks ago, I spoke to GOD. SHE agreed to rust up that cotter pin for you. We have your back.

  2. Have your vehicle put up on a rack and checked out by a very good mechanic with an auto body background. I've seen several vehicles hit from the rear like that end up having rear differential or transmission problems. I got creamed from behind twice like that while stopped in traffic or at a traffic light while I was driving marked patrol cars. The first time the girl wasn't paying attention. The second time she was texting.

    1. I'll second Sport Pilot's recommendation. If it's a frame-mounted hitch the diff, driveshaft and trans probably didn't take much stress, but the hitch, mounting bolts and frame attachment points sure did. Mass in motion equals energy and all that energy had to get absorbed somewhere; her car got 50% of it, but so did yours, even if hers was concentrated in a small spot. I wouldn't rule out the need for a frame pull on an alignment rack to get your truck's frame back into square (assuming it was in full alignment to start with...)

      Back in the day Japanese motorcycles had the frames painted with a thin coat of black paint that wrinkled and tore if the frame got flexed more than a tiny bit so we'd look for distorted frame paint at known stress points on every crash job that got brought in. Cars and trucks, unfortunately, don't have that sort of tell-tale.

  3. Whew, glad you didn't succeed... :-)

  4. Glad you and your whip (vehicle) are fine...
    Your adventures are funny...Thanks for making me laugh.
    Merry Christmas.

  5. As somebody who was rear ended a couple of times, the trailer hitch is almost as good as a frigging air bag back there. DON' REMOVE IT!
    Somebody needs to study the physics of why, but your vehicle remains unscratched and the offending party is looking at thousands in repairs.

  6. Even funnier when you drive away and pull off the bumper, grille, ac condenser, and radiator...

  7. Back in metal bumper days, a kid that was eyeballing some girls drove into the back of my '66 Ranchero while I was stopped at a light. Like you, I expected lots of damage. Found that he had driven my tow hitch back into it's proper position, with no visible damage.
    Earlier that week, I had tried to retrieve a CorrectCraft ski boat at the launch ramp, for the first time. Couldn't pull it. Just spun the tires. Got my dad to hook a chain to his F250 to pull me up the ramp. Couldn't move it, but he did stretch my hitch!(Towrite? tongue type that bolts to the bumper, and extends under to bolt to the frame or body.)
    Figured the trailer was caught somehow, so he parked above me on the bulwark, and used his load hoist to lift the rear of the trailer. THEN I could pull it out. Seems the concrete slab got undercut, and the wheels would drop over the edge and catch. NJ back bay.
    First model on that boat, I think. 16ft, 318 v8 Chrysler, 4bbl, v-drive. Originally built for the Cypress Gardens waterski show.

  8. Keep that trailer hitch on! Looks like a life savior to me! Might add a front grill to as a super bumper.

  9. Thank God for the hitch