Saturday, January 19, 2019

Only New Orleans could screw up a gun buy event.

Yep, here in New Orleans today, there was a gun buy. They like to call them "gun buy backs" but how can you buy something back that you never owned?

Apparently the Mayor's office got hold of some money courtesy of a New York-based outfit (Can you say "Bloomberg"?) and announced that they would pay residents of Orleans Parish for any working gun brought in, no questions asked and no ID required aside from proof of residency. (Yeah, that had a lot of folks scratching their heads.)

The offering price: $500.


So I quickly decided to part with an old single-shot 12 gauge with a frozen ejector and glued-on handguard. I mean, for $500? Hell yes. I even went the extra distance and snagged a Heritage Arms Rough Rider .22 from a local pawn shop, and since they were only paying one payment to each resident, I recruited one of the charming young ladies I know from the bar to come stand in line and turn it in, with the understanding that we'd split that payment minus what I paid for the revolver. And off I went this morning with two junk guns and a hung-over showgirl to collect a quick thousand bucks.

(Sorry folks...she made me promise no pictures of her.)

We got to the drop-off point an hour early and the line was already almost two blocks long. Damn!
So we stood in the rain and chatted with some of the other several hundred people and watched as the line continued to grow behind us. Apparently I wasn't the only one looking to dispose of a couple of guns this morning.
And after almost two hours, the line had moved about a block and a half and people coming out were reporting that they were out of cash and were only giving out vouchers for whatever. And then they were out of those. A city official came out and announced that they would still accept any guns that people wanted to turn in, but everyone just laughed at him or shook their heads and walked away with their guns. And we, like the majority of those who came out, were in this group. The excuse was that they didn't anticipate this many people. They then clarified in the news later that they'd only intended to accept 200.

Gun buy-back hits capacity in only one hour.

Seriously? How do you not offer five hundred dollars cash for literally any gun and not expect a turnout? Only Mayor Latoya Cantrell's people could screw something up this badly. I guarantee you over a thousand people were in that line.

And let's talk about those people, because I was observing.

A fair number were what you'd expect in this neighborhood, a couple blocks off Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd ad south of Claiborne Ave. They were older black people, men and women, who were bringing in unremarkable old junk. But the majority of the crowd was young, male and white, and several of them still had their guns in the factory boxes, suggesting that they'd done what I did and quickly gone out and bought a cheap gun and rushed down here to sell it for more. And as we all talked, many people openly admitted doing this. Hell, who said capitalism was dead? I think that had they just offered a hundred bucks a gun, many of the locals would have sold their junk and walked away, but since the offering was so high, the money ran out quick and almost every one of those people took their guns back home again. (Note: if anyone on the Mayor's staff is reading this, you need to keep offering $500. I still have two guns to sell you, you jackasses.)

And yes, I did surf the line a bit as we were all dissipating to see what collectibles I could snag, but I came up dry. Well not entirely. Anyone wanna buy a Rough Rider?

I also had to buy my accomplice lunch, and it's a true fact that respectable strippers don't settle for McDonalds after you make them stand in the rain for two hours, so that wasn't cheap either. Thanks Mayor Cantrell. Only a special kind of incompetent politician could screw up a plan to give away money.

Oh--and for the "guns cause crime" argument...a thousand people stood in the rain with guns today and no one got robbed or shot, even after the bulk of them got hosed by their government officials. Maybe more guns don't cause more crime, eh?


  1. Lol! Damn. Leave it to the Democrats to screw up capitalism. At least you got to eat a nice lunch with a pretty lady... and have a cheap .22 to tuck in the safe.

  2. They'd screw up a wet dream.

    Of course since the lady was wet and, ok, never mind. I wish that they'd do that here. You can buy Saturday Night Specials on the Indian Reservation for under $100.00 since the Bro's need fire water. I could sell hundreds and turn a very respectable profit. They need to make the buy-back not one per $500 transaction, but allow you to take as many as you can in. After all, it's all about getting guns off the street, right?

    1. We could call it "Operation Fast and Stupid or El Chapo's Gun Warehouse"

  3. Hey Murphy;

    Well you tried to do your duty and get all those illegal, immoral, and EEEVIL guns of the street. But democrat politicians being democrat don't understand capitalism and how money works. Good try, how much did that rough rider set you back if you don't mind my asking it ain't a bad looking pistol. And you did get to spend time with a pretty lady and that is always a good thing. Have patience, they will have another "Gun buy back" due to the demand that was shown.

  4. I now completely understand why, when my dad joined the Air Force, he never returned to Louisiana. Yes, the outside parishes are semi-okay, but corrupt, inept and just plain stupid politicians since before Spain sold it to France.

  5. The BH grip Rough Rider actually is not a bad shooter. It's not as accurate as my Single Six, and occasionally has slightly sticky extraction with Winchester bulk ammo, but overall, it's a fun plinker and a good tacklebox gun.

  6. $500!!! I have an old 'Ruby' .25 automatic that does not even work (was given to me, has box and papers). It is junk. But 500 smackeroos!! Yea, I'd go there in a second. Pity this ain't in Dallas.

  7. Dayang! I'd sell that useless old .22 pistol of Dad's for $500 in a heartbeat! That old shotgun, too. That would pay that infernal $400 membership fee plus buy something decent once the neuropathy in my hands heals.

  8. Moral of the story:

    "anti-gun idiots create more people owning guns by offering too much."

  9. Sigh... Your timing sucks... And you didn't get up early enough! Better luck next time!

  10. All the guys at the plate match Friday night before were talking about going. They'd picked up pawn shop leavings and other things to sell off. I thought about participating but you needed a Orleans Parish address. Glad I didn't bother.

  11. "Mayor LaToya" say no more.

  12. Well another day tangling with the incompetent fools of government. Good plan, but things don't often go according to plan. At least you spent some quality time with a good chick; some of my best casual contacts are strippers.
    Cheers and all that.