Wednesday, July 15, 2009

There's always gotta be an asshole...

And the latest Asshole of the Day award goes to this guy from RS Granite World who saw fit to drive slow in the left lane of Route 7 all the way from the Route 9 intersection to well past the Greenway exit yesterday morning. And he did this despite the fact that there was a vehicle right behind him—mine—that was flashing it’s headlights at him trying to get him to move to the right lane so that the line of other cars stacking up behind him could get by.

But no, this douche (thanks to Nicki for that lovely descriptor) who made eye contact with me in his mirrors several times, just continued to drive along in the left lane, making no effort to either pass traffic to his right or merge in with it. And everyone else in northern Virginia had to endure the resulting traffic backup that this clown was deliberately causing.

Let me say first of all that people like this guy truly need and deserve to be yanked out of their cars and beaten with baseball bats. Life’s too short to have to put up with assholes and this guy was going out of his way to be one.

Unfortunately we live in a society that protects assholes from the consequences of their assholery, so it’s actually illegal to administer the beating that this guy earned while smugly obstructing rush-hour traffic.

However that doesn’t mean that we can’t identify the company that he either works for or owns. This is easy, at it was on a sign on the back of his truck, literally jammed into my face and the faces of all of the other people that he was taunting. And my recommendation is, of course, that you avoid ever doing business with RS Granite World, because a guy who will screw with people in traffic just for the apparent hell of it is also quite likely to deliberately mess up a job in your home or business just because you’ve irked him or he thinks it’s funny. And if you’ve ever been pissed off by someone who drives like this guy was driving, feel free to give RS Granite World a call and let them know what’s on your mind. The number’s right on that back of that Toyota in the picture, or you can e-mail the company at Let 'em know that you read about it here.


  1. poliwog8:45 AM

    There are so many of them hiding in anonymity (relative) but this asshole's name is Roberto Santamaria. He's gonna get some calls, wattayathink?

  2. He's probably Richard Slimey of "RS Granite World."

  3. You know, when did it become 'manly' to cry to the legal authorites when you had to take an ass-kicking for behaving badly? What ever happened to taking your medicine and shutting up about it? :)

  4. Anonymous10:24 AM

    This has got to be my number one irritant. Thank god I don't have blood pressure problems or I'd probably stroke out one day because one of these assholes can't understand the concept of keep right.

  5. Umm..."assholery"...I challenge that word! :-)

    Glad to see that you haven't lost your flair for anger and describing your encounters with idiots in your travels. ROFL.

    I wondered what happened. Figured you were laying off the double espresso caffeine for a while or something. Now, can we bring back some of those Lagniappe hijinks stories too please?! His cameos have been kinda sparse lately :-)

  6. OH HOH! So they do the same crap down there too!? When DE, VA, MD, NC, SC, GA, FL, PA people drive on the NJ turnpike (my route to and from work) they drive in the left hand lane (we call them left lane dicks.) average speed is 75 they do the speed limit, don't move over, or follow OUR law of "keep right pass left". They are the ones that should be busted for road rage, cause they cause it!

  7. Anonymous7:27 PM

    seems like someone is a little pissed off about something so small as driving. Lets kill all the old people too because they drive slow...acctually anyone who goes under the speed limit should be immolated right?

  8. What pisses me off is the total lack of common courtesy. Age has nothing to do with it.

    But then you're probably one of those tools who steers with one hand while he drives in the left lane, grinning like a syphilitic fool as you imagine that your rudeness is giving you some sort of power over the better people trying to get past you, aren't you?

  9. WolfDog9:51 AM

    Back in the late 80's, early 90's there was a nutcase named Nestor (I can't remember his first name) who drove in the passing lane of D.C.'s Capitol Beltway at exactly the posted speed limit. His reasoning for doing this was ... "if you are driving the speed limit, you have no need to pass" ... or some such idiotic statement. In the ongoing letters to the editor (Washington Post) he was informed by (I believe) a Maryland State Trooper that "traveling in a passing lane" would earn him a traffic ticket. Idiots like him were then acussed of "Nestoring" on the highways. One small claim to fame.