So last night, I'm on the couch, relaxing and reading a book. And as he often does when he gets restless, Lagniappe was amusing himself by running full-tilt from one end of the house to the other, crashing into walls at each end as he tries to turn on a dime on the hardwood floors. It's weird, but after all these years, he shows no sign of stopping and I quit asking why. I just stay out of the way to avoid getting hit by a hundred-pound unguided missile.
However last night, I'd neglected to pick a few things up, and when the cannonball dog came rocketing into the room on one of his shuttles, he slipped on a piece of paper that was on the floor. His hind legs went out from under him and he tumbled into the couch, bounced off, and nailed my small table that my coffee cup was resting on. Of course the cup was full, and it fell smack onto Lagniappe, dousing him thoroughly with the drink, which fortunately was not all that hot at the time.
Then the moron looks at me as if to announce that he'd meant to do that before getting up and shaking, sending coffee flying all over me the rest of the room.
I swear, one day I WILL trade this dog for a goldfish...and then I'll flush the goldfish.