Just back from picking Belle up. Noticed that it's downright cold out there. In fact, it's so cold that...
1. It's so cold that Starbucks is serving coffee on a stick.
2. It's so cold that my grandma's false teeth are chattering, and they're still in the glass.
3. It's so cold the lawyers have their hands in their OWN pockets.
4. It's so cold that flashers are now just carrying pictures.
5. It's so cold I had to chisel the dog off a lamp-post.
6. It's so cold that Cuban refugee's are skating into Miami.
7. It's so cold, I saw a teen boy pull his pants up.
8. It's so cold, the optician was giving away free ice scrapers with every new pair of eyeglasses.
9. It's so cold, we had to chop up the piano for firewood. (But we only got two chords.)
10. It's so cold, Boy Scouts are offering to de-ice little old ladies.
Thank you. I'll be here all week.