On spiders and sissies

So this morning I head into the bathroom, about to indulge in a nice, hot shower. Fortunately for me, I actually look at the shower knobs instead of just reaching out and turning them as I often do, because there is a fair-sized Nursery spider sitting right between the knobs.

By “fair-sized”, I mean that he’s from 2” to 3” long. They get bigger.

Now these spiders have been found in the lair and blogged before, notably here (with picture) and here. I’ve encountered a few others that haven’t been blogged as well, and when I find them, I capture them and release them outside. Small spiders are icky with their webs and such; these larger hunting spiders are just cool.

So silly me, I decided to share my treasure with others before putting it outside.

First I called Lagniappe in. He came bounding into the bathroom as if he was about to be the recipient of a treat, then stopped short when he saw the spider. He also has seen these before, and it shames me to report that this once-fearless police dog backed right out of the bathroom and skedaddled down the hall to parts unknown. He wasn’t having any part of that thing.

Chickenshit.

Then as I was in the kitchen trying to find a cup with a lid to catch it in, Nicki bid me a good morning so I invited her into the bathroom to show her this fascinating creature. Of course I did not tell her what was there because Nicki usually likes surprises. But judging by her scream of “Oh my GOD!!!” and her bout of hyperventilation as she ran back out of the room, I got the impression that she didn’t much care for this one.

Well if you’re not even going to look at it…

So I captured it without too much trouble, and I eventually got Nicki to open the door to the outside for me as I needed both hands to hold the cup with the spider in it and keep the lid on it. I could feel the spider scrabbling around inside the cup, and I knew that if it got away from me now, I’d have a hell of a time catching it again until it calmed down and came back out in the open. As it was, I wasn’t allowed to even bring it out into the hall until Nicki had run all the way back down to the kitchen and barricaded herself in the pantry, no doubt with Lagniappe for company.

Pair of Chickenshits.

I eventually released the spider outdoors and it scampered off. Then I went to calm Nicki.
I probably should not have told her that these spiders are fairly common around here. Now she says that she’s not coming over any more.
I also probably should not have told her that they certainly live in HER house too. She doesn’t live that far away and these creatures are indigenous to the area.

“But I’ve never EVER seen one of those,” she proclaimed. I told her that just because she hasn’t seen them, that doesn’t mean that there aren’t a bunch of them lurking in the dark recesses of her garage, basement, attic, and yard. And being nocturnal creatures that only come out in the dark, odds of her never seeing one are pretty good, however that doesn’t mean that they aren’t there in abundance.

When I last saw her this morning, she was calling her realtor. Something about putting her house up for sale.

And I thought that these former Army chicks were supposed to be tough. Alvin York and Audie Murphy would surely not be impressed.